Going through grief can be traumatic. Going through trauma is also dealt with in a similar way to grieving. Have you heard of the seven stages of grief? 1) Shock and Denial, 2)Pain and Guilt, 3)Anger and Bargaining, 4)Depression, Reflection, and Loneliness, and 5) The Upward Turn.
While this may seem like a linear path, follow steps 1-5 then done! Right? Nope. Not for me, and not for many people in our current social and political climate.
I’m currently bouncing between steps 3 and 4. When I’m in the Anger phase, I lash out. Sometimes, like last night, I even black out. I literally have no recollection of those facebook posts or messages I sent anyone. It’s essentially a blind rage.
And then I hit Bargaining, which is when I profusely apologize and say I’ll try to do better and stop being angry, because really, yelling at people doesn’t help them. And it doesn’t help them understand or help you. It just makes people more defensive and nothing is accomplished.
When I’m in the stage of reflection, I write. I’m able to form clear, concise, sentences that get straight to the point, sometimes with a little humor. Sometimes I mix metaphors trying to get the point across, but I can go back and edit and fix it. That’s also why my angry facebook posts are still up, and why I don’t block people on social media very often. (More on this later too)
This entire website was published completely unpolished, unfinished, a work in progress, because it is, and I am too.
Curiosity Killed the Cat 